I’m too much of a perfectionist. I fear rejection—in other words, people will think my content isn’t good enough—so unless I think the shot I’m uploading to Instagram is ‘perfect’ and I’m 100% happy with the outfit, the background, the editing, I won’t put it up. But you’ll never be your ‘best’ you—or build a reputation and track record of creative content—if you stay a fearful wallflower forever. I am enough. I have to re-learn this notion again and again as I’m yet to crack it.
Lately I’ve been in situations that have made me consider the fact that I might be paralyzed by perfection. It’s easy to focus on fear, to let it guide our decisions or paralyze us into inaction. I’m scared of the unknown and fear that my best simply won’t be good enough.
While it’s common to doubt your own potential, I’ve realized that the truth is that my ability to improve is only as strong as my determination. As an important factor in any accomplishment, my mentality will either push me to finish the journey to reaching my goals, or discourage me from even beginning the process. I’ve realised that the #1 excuse holding me back is worrying about whether or not I’m good enough.
With the expectations we set for ourselves in our daily lives and the accomplishments we witness from others on social media, it’s easy to focus on what I could be doing more of instead of being proud of what I’ve already done. It’s unfair to compare yourself to those who have a different journey than you. To avoid falling into this toxic cycle, recognize that being supportive is a healthier approach and that turning the discouragement you feel into determination to reach your goals is also a great idea. You’re the only person who can control your life; therefore, don’t allow the influences of others to intimidate you from truly creating what you want out of it.
Whether it’s praise from my peers, a pat on the back from my mum or a ‘like’ on Instagram, at times I feel like I need this validation from others to feel I’m doing ok. And I’m sure you do too. How often do we forget that we don’t need outside acceptance?
We stumble through life knowing roughly what feels wrong and right but there are no set rules and there’s no ‘correct’ route when you feel unsure about a decision or life choice. If I don’t get something that I was in the running for, I can start to worry that I’m not good enough, or OK. It’s become a bit of a problem for me, I’ll overthink, over-analyse and beat myself up over it but it’s also a chance to make personal tweaks and ask why don’t I feel enough? What are the real reasons?
Instead of thinking that ‘I’m not good enough’, I’m trying to…
- Be honest with myself and discover the underlying issue of why I feel this way
- Scheduling moments, occasionally days, to take a break from social media
- Reaching out and spending time with some of my favorite people
So, how do we start to feel like we’re ENOUGH? Acceptance. One word, so easy to say, but much harder to put in to practise. It may take weeks, months, years to crack it but in the meantime start telling yourself you are brilliant, smart, funny, beautiful, flawed, vulnerable, dynamic, unsure, ever-changing – and know that you are OK. In fact you’re perfect.